Aitraf-e-Jurm aur December 7, 2012

– December ki raatein shadeed se shadeed hoti jarae hain, her doobta sooraj udaasi k liye darwaze khol jata he aur jhala chand khud to kabhi mukamal hota he aur kabhi adhora per wajood ko mukamal tor pe adhora ker jata he us pe Faraz Sb k lafz qayamat ki tarah mere kanon me baj rhe the, usko mere daftar se gaye doosra din tha aur us khol charhayi hui larki jo k bazahir bht khush thi mujhe mere hi ghar me maat degayi thi mozo chahe mohabat ka ho, mazhab ka ho ya aqeeday ka wo her lehaz se aurat ki hami thi, magar faraz sahib k lafzo aur uski bato ne mujhe tamam raat sone ne dia aur ap me bht se us kaifiat se waqif hunge jab ander ghutan is qadar hojaye k bahir ki hawa bhi ander ko ventilation muhaiya na ker sake, us k nazdeek mohabat me tafreeq ya muqabla ne hota aur her rishte ki ik had honi chahiye ta k rishte apas me bajna shuru kerde aur Faraz sb ne kaha tha k

Uska apna hi karishma hai fusoon hai, yun hai
Yun to kehne ko sabhi kehte hain yun hai yun hai

Maine kaha k Khuda ko hamari namaze ne chahiye koi jatan koi asool ne mohabat ka tu us ne kaha k mohabat me to insan wo kerta he jis se dosre ko rahat mile aur ap sunto k peeche faraz kese chor skte hain aur Faraz sb k misro ne shahadat de k Case dismiss ker dia

Tum muhabbat mein kahan sood O zyaan le aaye
Ishq ka naam khirad hai na junoon hai, yun hai

Khair din to jese tese logo me guzar jata he, raat mushkil hoti he aur khas ker december ,maine khud ko bht dalail dene ki koshish ki, taveele bhi per phir mere zehn me marhoom Ma ka wo jumla agya k “Jo Muqa larai k baad yad aye wo apne mu pe marna chahiye” shaied wo 16 ya 17 baras nikah yafta larki sahi keh rhi thi aur main khud ko bilawaja samjha rha tha, mera ander us ki baat pe razi tha per khud ko ghalat manana aur wo bhi aurat k samne hum mardo ko aksar ajeeb lagta he is pe Faraz sb k is misre ki labaik ne is pe bhi meri shatranj ko check-mate kerdia

Ab tum aaye ho meri jaan! tamasha karne
Ab to darya mein talatum na sukun hai, yun hai

Khair jab ander khali hojaye to wajood bhi ret ka mehal hota he aur phir ahista ahista wajood ki toot phoot, uspe ander girne wale aanso jo haqeeqat me bahir behne wale aansoaon se ziada khatarnak hote hain, Khair shaied masla hamara he hum ne her cheez ka koi na koi format, bahao ya protocols rkhliye jese k mohabat me jab tak hawas ka phool ne hoga tab talak sache pyar ki takmeel na mumkin hogi, jab tk fb password na share hun rishte me Trust ne ata aur han agar din me kayi dafa muhabat ka izhar na ho to wo mohabat ne hogi, Hye humne cheezo ko shaied bht mushkil ker dia he q k Mohabat mashwara hoti to tumse pooch k kerte aur agar is k ander bhi koi system agya to ye aur to kuch bhi hoskta he Mohabat ne – Is ihsas k upar akhri teh Faraz sb ki bichai hui thi aur phir mere pass lafz ne the han ankho se kuch beh rha tha aur mujhe apne bhai k likhe kuch lafz yaad ane lage k “Mard jeetne pe roya ne kerte han harne pe chup ne reh skte “

Naaseha! tujh ko khabar kya ke muhabbat kya hai
Roz aa jaata hai samjhaata hai, yun hai, yun hai

22 baras k december ki hafta-gira aur chand aitraf-e-jurm

#Decemberidiction #khokhlelog

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Kaun tha Manto?

Subah se qalam hath me kissi nojawan larki ki ankho ki manind athkelian ker rha tha, Log arae the, fone ki ghantia baj rhi thi, mre samne kaghzo ka ik hujoom aur phir Shashca k ander likha ik tukra jiska mozo “Kaun tha Manto” – Atendent ka ye chai ka shaied 4tha cup tha, “Sb 3 bje fm 94 ki meeting he” – Driver ne gari nikali, safar ki ibteda shuru hui aur khatam hogyi – Logo me bethna tha so khaul charhaya aur duniya ka hisa ban gya wapis aya to saman utha k gari club me rok di – Library me gaya uski kitab uthai aur laga pochne ik chasma lagi tasweer se ye manto kaun tha?
agli bat likhni thi per sunane me aya k fehash likhta tha aur tarat kehta e k manto fehash likhta tha to bhai sach barhna hota he – Manto wo likhta tha jo he wo ne jo hona chahiye ya jo tum faqt adventure k ya so called intellectual banane ki khatir coffee ka mug hath me liye style se kehte ho – Manto her bache har umar k liye tha kissi k liye sex writer, kahin pe tamache marne wala aur kahin pe faqt sawal kerne wala. Mera manto k blouse se sogandhi tak aur farishte se toba tek singh tak kali shalwar ho dhuan ho ya shanti maine manto ko bap se chup k bhi aur baawaz-e-buland bhi parha he ye shaied wohi he jise kabhi maine apni mardangi ko khiraj bakshne k liye parha aur kabhi ise parh k mardangi se ghin ayi, Per jo likha wo sach likha jo tha wo likha aur manto ne us waqt me likha jab log jante bhi ne the k halat yahan tak ajaye ge tum manto ko jo chahe kaho per na to haqaiq badle ge na manto k fasane aur halat khud manto k lafzo ki shahadat dege.

A random piece on Manto Sb.

Haider Miraj
10:31 pm

Manto fehash likhta he to sach bhi to nanga hota he na bhai

15-5-2012

. *Nuqta*

aksar aik nuqtay pe aa k hum haar maan jatay hain, thak jatay hain, Mano sab andhera hota hai, koi rishta koi dost koi humnawa apna ne lagta, tamam achi cheeze aur pehlo bure nazar ate hain jese ik chasma ya andhera ankho k samne ajaye aur is k natehe hum khud ko rohani o jismani azieat datay hain, taluq mei hisab kitab ker k baniye ban jatay hain, aur apni kamzoriyaan logon pe baant dete hain ander janta he k ghalat hain per khud sokhta se dalail la ker apni her kamzori ko apne hi kissi pe dal k khud ko sahi manwate hain aur phr andhere me bhagte hain, logo me sab acha per rat azaab ban k utrti hai, pehle mahol se phir logo se aur phr zat se nafrat hojati he aur phr ye ihsas itna shadeed hojata he k wapis ana mushkil hota he tab namaze aur deen ko b testing k liye apna jata he her sajde me khud ko ye daleel k ‘dekha koi farq ne para’ aur her cheez me itna hisab k unglio k pore b paseene me bheeg jate hain per is sab me hum per ye bhool jaatay hain k ye nukta ager sabr o ilm se ji lia tou sab muyasar aye ga aur agar is lamhe sab kuch us k sapurd kerdia to phr sab acha hoga aur ye sab kerna mano itna mushkil b ne bus katori apni daikho auron ki nahi, zat apni dekho aur taluq Allah se apna dekho is taluq me koi wazeefa, koi peer, koi cheez ne ati ye tumhara aur tumhare Khuda ka taluq hai jisme koi dhund ne he tum jitna qareeb jaoge utna sakoon me rhoge aur zaat mei jhukaao, rishto mei asal lao andar bahar sakoon hoga aur phr waqae wo malik hoga aur tumhe ihsas hoga k tum kitne nawaze hue hoge aur phir tum jan jaoge k q Surah-e-Rehman me bar bar ye kaha gya ‘ Pus tum apne Rab ki kis kis naimat ko jhutlaoge’

ALLAH g apko haq ki taqat dein aur behtreen karsaz wo hai

Talib-e-Dua

HM
30/12/2011
05:23 am

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Kirdar

Khaul dar Khaul, Ander se bahir tak jang, adavatein, shikayetein, muskurahtien, sharartein, wafa, jafa, haya, hilal, haram, aur tamam jazbat, tajarubat humare ander hote hain kissi na kissi roop me – aur un k upar ik kirdar – Dekho jo tum dekhna chaho, socho jo tum sochna chaho, hansti ankhe, gati ankhe ya phir sadion ki si udas ankhien – Ankh jese chand sa chiragh jis ki nukar ko kheench k koi kan k pass hole se laya aur chor k kahin dor chala gaya aur muskurahat aisi jese kissi ne motio ki si gundli ko hole se khol k dhaga khencha kuch moti dikhe aur kuch shaied dikhne ki chah me ik soje se ‘pehle main, pehle main’ ki behs me jute hue hain ….. Khair dekho q k aurat humesha se mukhtalif kirdaro me juti rehti hain kabhi dost, kabhi koi benam ya mukamal taluq, kabhi behn, kabhi ma, kabhi biwi – aur wo ban jati he jo muashra dekhna chahe khair mujhe tum wo mano wo jano jo janana chaho,dekhlo mere hath ki unglian kesi hain kissi ik k qareeb kissi dosri k dor kahin jhuki hui aur shaied kahin bund muthi ki tarah ki koi ik ungli … Kirdar k nate ya sanche k haq se main faqt ye kehti hun k meri doji ankh me dekho, mere ander bhi tum jhanko, main bhi wafa k jese hun, isi zameen ki basi hu, hawa ki jayi hun aur asman se ayi hun – kitni khamosh se ankh he jese sadio se koi mustaqil andhere me ho aur phir jahin chandh ka chiragh jale to ankhe chundhiya jati hain aise hi zat se bhagte bhagte jab khud se samna hota he to kirdar aur insan lar parte hain q k ik hone k bawajod wo ik ne hote – jese main aur Shazmeera waheed zaman

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HM
2:10 pm
30/12/11

This abstract is written for a magazine of BSS and the copyrights belong to Ms. Shazmeera Waheez Zaman(Editor Urdu Section)

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Fankar – Meri Nazar me :)

Logo ko hansane wala ya zat ka fankar ander se bht zakhmi hota he …..use ik ma jesi biwi chahiye hoti he, us me bhook se ziada Mamta ki khwahish hoti he ………. Wo shaied hawas se ziada mohabat, uns aur rafaqat ka pehredar hota he, wo bht hasas hota he aur shaied yehi uski tabahi ki waja banta he agar use ye samjhaya jaye k bhai logo k peche mat bhato to wo kehta he k khali rangmanjh pe to her insan khelta he, fankar he hi wo jo duniya k samne rangmanjh pe ubhre

Haider Miraj
7:49
8/12/11

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Photo Courtesy:Sculpture art by Thomas Kuebler

 

*Abstract of a conversation with someone who is quite close spirtually, emotionally – Behn  

Talash – Zaad-e-Rah

Zat ka ihtisab hamesha se hi mushkil hota he ……. Zat ki talash shaied roh ko masmar kerdeti he, wajood ko sangsar aur ankhon ko pathar. Ajeeb kaifiat hoti he aur dar bhi jab insan khud k sath ankh macholi khelta he …… Sooraj ki roshni aaj bhi nomolood bache ki tarah thi shafaf aur bgair kissi khol k khirki k ander utar rha thi …… Main aaj wahin bethi thi jahan aaj se shaied chand baras pehle bethi thi per salon me sadio ka fasla teh kerna kisse kehte hain ye maine ab seekha ….. Shaied jb tabdeeli ka waqt ata he to wo itni hi tezi se ati he ….. Insan aksar apni zat k do kholo k darmiyan jang larta he aur phir apni zat ko hi dhoke deta he ….. Ahista ahista ghari ki soyian mere ander zat k raz afshan ker rae thi ….. Her ik lamha mere ander maut ban k utarta tha ….. Tik Tik Tik …… Jab bhi insan ko ye weham guzarta he k wo sabs e ziada kamzor hain usi ik lamhe wo apni zindagi k sab se kamzor lamhe se bahaduri se jang lar rha hota he …. ….. Tik Tik Tik …… Jab bhi insan ko ye weham guzarta he k wo kissi k jane k bad marjayega usi ik lamhe wo zehni tor pe us shaks k bgair jeene k liye tyar ho rha hota he 🙂 ….. Tik Tik Tik …… Jis ik lamhe insan ye sochta he k us ne ye ye ye kia aur us k sath ye ye ye hua to wo khud munsif ban jata he aur khasare me jata he jab k Allah behtreen faisle kerne wala hota he ….. Tik Tik Tik …… Shaied main bht wafa kerne wali thi maine ye ye ye kia usi ik lamhe wo bhool jata he k jahan wafa ho wahan pe sabar, shukar aur bardasht ajati he aur insan kitna bewaqoof he jo ye soch leta he koi insan use kuch de sakega koi bhi kuch ne depata
Mujhe pata hi ne chala kab ankho se pani nikalna shuru hogya aur mujhe ihsas hua k mere ander abhi bhi bht kuch baqi he wafa, ihsas aur jazbat shaied khameer insan ka us k mahool se ziada mazboot hota he ….. Insan jitna marzi ghalat hojaye akhir pe jeet khameer ki hoti he aur mujhe yad he k ma ki dant se le k aba k lad tak aur choto k maan k sath baro ki zimedari ne mujhe kabhi bhi be rang ne hone dia aaj main jitna bhi toti thi wo shaied is waja se thi k main bhool gayi thi k mard k khameer me wafa ne balke ye to taluq hi bhook aur zarorat ka he …. Behar Kaif hosle apni jagha hain bebasi apni jagha ……..Ghalti sahid insan se ye hoti he k insan andha hota he aur raste pe tilkan bht ziada hoti he aur her ik is raftar se ata he k ap gir jaye per ye bhool jata he k jitne bhi log girae hath sirf ik hi zat pakarti he aur wo behtreen pakar wala he ….. Mujhe ihsas ne hua waqt bht tezi se guzar rha tha aur shaied ankho k ander khamoshi utar rae thi …. mere liye naya khol charhana aur jana mushkil tha maine shaied zat se chand sawal poche aur muskura k uth gayi, Main jeet gayi thi q k tamam sawalo ka jawab ik hi tha mujhe ye lagta tha mere sath hi q? maine itni mehnat ki? mere sath waqt ne ye q kia? Kya mere sath hi hamesha ye hona hota he? – Kuch bhi insan k bas me ne hota jahan pe insan ko lagta he k wo khud kuch ker rha he aur main kamiyab ho k rhoga usi lamhe kuch ghalat hojata he, Jb koi cancer ka mariz ijazat lene wala hota he wo bilkul theak hojata he, jb b insan itrata he wo reza reza hojata he – Inshort insan ya kuch bhi self made ne hota sab Godmade hota he us ki raza se ne to mehnat to sab kerte hain, dukh to sabko hain, haalt to sab k sath khelte hain bus hamari pehchan mukhtalif hain jb ye jawab mil jaye to insan faqeer ho k bhi badshah banjata he 🙂
Mujhe weham guzra k meri talash mukamal hochuki aur Shaied meri ankho ki khamoshi ne mujhpe zindagi k raz khol diye aur kehte hain na mayusi kufr he aur zindagi khoobsorat q k Allah g kehte hain ‘Wo tum ne Jante jo main janta hun’

-Dhoop aur chaon bant k hum ne angan me dewar chuni
Log bazid rehte hain phir bhi rishto ki pemaish per

Haider Miraj
7:30 Pm
19/9/11

1.)IS tehreer ka is tasweer se wabista shaks se koi taluq ne per alfaz ki tarjumani ki waja se unse khas darkhwast ki gayi, Thank you Aajoo for giving an image to my bakwas 🙂 . 2) This is my personal opinion and you ahve every right to disagree.

Ankhon k aansoao se marasim purane hain ....... Mehan ye ghar me aye to uthta ne dhuan

Iqrar Nama

Jazbat ko lafzon me utarna hamesha se mushkil hota he q k jazbat lafzon k ghulam ne hote aur lafz aksar jazbat se aari hote hain. Insan ko kuch cheeze kabhi ne bholti pehli chot, pehli barish, pehla pyar aur pehli har :). Shaied dil phaink hone k sath sath ik khas umar tk main jazbati kamzori ka shikar rha aur bhool gya k pehli mohabat umar k faraq ki tarah hoti he chah k b bhulai ne jaskti, q k wo insan ka asal hota he us k bad ik khas pehr pe ihsas hota he k mard k khameer me mohabat ne he aur agar he to ishq wo bhi uski zat se aur belos, khair shaied jazbat abhi kache the, fidwi naya naya jawan tha aur shaied andhera kafi ziada to usme jahan roshni nazar ayi mohabat ker betha- Sid, shaied wo thi andhere me roshni ki kiran, zindagi me mukamal rishta kya hota he maine us se seekha, roshni kya hoti he, himat kise kehte hain, jang kese larte hain yeh cheeze maine usi se sekhi- Kitabi bate ik taraf per wo haqeeqtan ik taluq tha jo k na to bojh tha aur na to bhool, jis me insan na uktata he aur na thakta, jis me apa banu ki seemi k se andhese bhi the aur qayumi ka self created depression bhi, We started up in mid 2006, us k bad shaied ik dosre ki zat ka hisa ban gye, pehli mohabat insan k zehan aur roh ko qaid ker leti he aur us k bad wo jis k sath ho us k sath b ne hota us k paimane absolute se relative hojate hain, maine zindagi me shaied kissi ko itni shidat se kissi ko chahte, mante aur us k liye Allah se zid ker k falah mangte ne dekha shaied aurat k khameer me wafa he :). Lekin ye jo log likhne likhane, aur zindagi k raz ya khoj k safar pe nikalte hain inka almia he k yeh kabhi bhi apni zat ki daryaft kissi ko bta ne skte aur shaied yehi waja he k pehle wafa pe unglian uthti hain aur phr depression ki goli rishte ka seena chak ker deti hai shaied mere sath bhi yehi hua, q k jab maine rishte ko apni miraj pe dekha to use apna asal samjha betha aur ye sochne laga k asal se kya chupa he waqt na bhi dein, cheeze na bhi btae wo samjh jayege per ye bhool betha k insan jese jese kissi cheez k qareeb jata he uski barikian use nazar ati jati hain aur yehi waja he k ik darar b chak bna deti he pehle waqt pe shikwe phir forgranted k tane aur phir rishta ik aise mor pe jise bojh lagne laga aur phir ik lambi khamoshi, mujhe tab bht shidat se ihsas hua k kissi bhi rishte me khamoshi ajaye to wo rishte ko deemak ki tarah chat jati he. Khair us k bad maine farar k raste dhondhe aur khud ko ye samjha dia k uski zindagi se nikal jao to behtar he per shaied insan kabhi b apne asal se nae bhag paya …. per agar kuch cheeze iqrar kerni pare to main sar-e-dar ye kahoga k han usne mujhse lafz mohabat se bhi ziada mohabat ki, han usne mujhe wo bna dia jo aj main hun, han chunao k lamhe me aksar main dagmagaya magar usne rishte ki pakezgi aur nafs k amal ko kabhi rishte me na ane dia, han main ye manta hun k usne mujhe wo tamam rishte ik shakal me diye jiski mujhe waqt pe zarorat thi, han mujh usne girne se bachaya, han meri khamoshi ne wajood aur taluq dono ko bht nuqsan pohnchaya han mere farar ne mujhe mere asal ka maqroz ker dia aur han main ghalat tha – Shaied agar ana ko qaid kerlia jata aur chezo ko samjh lia jata to ye rishta kabhi bojh na banta,

Na koi chaj, te na koi wal si
Pehla ishq te pehli gal si
bekhabri wich tehni tut gayi
KAche Rukh ote kacha phal si

shaied na mujhe koi rasm maloom thi na koi tareeqa pehli mohabat aur wo bhi pehli bar thi, mujhe pata bhi ne chala kab tehni tot gayi aur us k rukh pe phal bhi abhi kacha tha

Socha tha bht toot k chahege tujhe hum - Chaha bhi bht jana,tote bhi bht hum

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Haider Miraj
11:51 Pm
22/8/11

This is a personal experience and shared on a personal blog so difference of opinion must exist.